Beth (B) – I am feeling this is all you Lord but what about…
God (G) – Live, breathe, rejoice, rest in me and let’s explore your heart. Am I big enough?
B – Yes
G – Do I need help?
B – No
G – Will I use others?
B – Yes
G – What builds your faith the most?
B – Believing your word, thinking, and speaking truth? What Lord? What builds my faith the most?
G – Love, loving me – knowing me – resting in me – being still and knowing I Am.
B – Yes Lord.
G – You will not miss anything. I promise.
B – I’m swirling, all sorts of questions about circumstances
G – The same is true – it always comes back to love – love me with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding – love and trust – I am not surprised. I am in control. I Am. Always I Am. Just lean on me and not on your own understanding. Let me be. I am enough for you – I am more than enough for any situation you face, and I will never leave you nor forsake you – I Am. Breathe. That’s right – breathe. Enough nonsense. Let’s just rest. I will make it clear and write it on tablets.
B – I don’t want rules. I want your heart, Lord. I just want to know your heart. Help me know your ways.
G – I confound.
B – Yeah, I love that.
G – I confuse.
B – Yes Lord.
G – But I am not confused. Minds Swirl. I do not. I am clear, precise; it is safe to let me do.
B – Yes Lord. I truly, really with all my heart do not want to hang on to any part of my life. I want you to have it all. You can do better, and I do trust you – in a place that is scary – I feel scared. Lord, help me believe and rest in you. I want energy, vitality, health, clear mind, compassionate heart, time with you, a servant’s heart toward family and whoever you want. I want peace that surpasses all understanding. I want my Daddy, Lord. I want all the mess, confusion, sadness, disappointment, anger and discouragement, all the feelings that aren’t the fruit of the Holy Spirit to be yours. I hand over all of it to my Daddy.
Galatians 5:22-26 But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control. Against such things there is no law. Those who belong to Christ Jesus have crucified the sinful nature with its passions and desires. Since we live by the Spirit, let us keep in step with the Spirit. Let us not become conceited, provoking and envying each other.
Lord, I repent for any sins against you or your precious people. Lord, I thank you for your forgiveness. I receive your forgiveness. Lord, I pray this day you would help me to see things through your eyes. Lord, I pray, let your will be done.
G – surprises?
B – Ok. I am ok with surprises because you are. I don’t want the in the box God. I want you fully, out of the box. Whatever comes Lord, may I always be full of you and offer my praise and thanksgiving. I want to glorify you, Lord. Lord, is there anything else?
G – Come back.
B – Yes Lord.
Excerpt from Truth in Hard Places